When you go 6 for 16 and find yourself one game out of last place in your pick’em pool, maybe the only purpose of writing a preview column is for people to laugh at you. Having people laugh at me didn’t stop me from getting married, and neither will this. Here’s a breakdown of some of this weeks key games.
San Francisco 49ers (+7.5) at Minnesota Vikings
Chris: Congrats to the 49ers for being this year’s Dolphins. I think the 49ers are tough enough to keep this game close. As a matter of fact, I think this game is boringly close, like 16-12 Vikings.
Graham: Last week I said San Francisco sucked. And you know what- they don’t. They’re not good, mind you, but they don’t suck. Sucking is John Mayer. The 49ers are more like Snow Patrol. Boring, inoffensive, nothing really noteworthy. That said, they can keep it close. Minnesota wins, but the Niners cover.
Green Bay Packers (-6.5) at St. Louis Rams
Chris: Thank God for the Packers schedule. They had the easiest road to 3-0, and yet, they’ll be 2-1. Fantasy points galore for Packers players.
Graham: I don’t want to talk about the packers right now, other than to say they’re going to cover. And if they don’t, I quit. Not just the blog, everything. Life. I swear.
Atlanta Falcons (+4.5) at New England Patriots
Chris: My initial instinct was to pick the Falcons. Then I remember that my instinct is retarded. The Falcons don’t play that well on the road, the Pats are coming off a loss and everyone is probably thinking Brady is done. It’s never good when someone is counting out the Pats. New England wins by double digits.
Graham: What was that about counting out the Pats? I’m game! They look terrible right now. This is my upset special of the week. Falcons win outright.
Tennessee Titans (+2.5) at New York Jets
Chris: Classic letdown game for the Jets. Plus, the Titans are the single fat girl at last call, desperate.
Graham: I have nothing to say. Titans.
Miami Dolphins (+5.5) at San Diego Chargers
Chris: The Dolphins showed some life on Monday even though they gave the game away during one of the worst 2-minute drills in the history of football. The Dolphins have more trouble scoring than the single fat girl before last call (that was my Geoff Calkins same joke twice in a post special). San Diego wins big.
Graham: Honest to God, how did the Dolphins lose that game? They let Indy have the ball for less than 15 minutes! The Colts’ defenders were sucking wind! Ted Ginn, you idiot, how did that ball slip through your hands. What a gut wrenching loss. You don’t recover from games like that one. San Diego walks, and Miami’s on their way to a 4-12 season.
Indianapolis Colts (+1.5) at Arizona Cardinals
Chris: Isn’t this the same Cardinals team that lost at home to the 49ers, and now, they’re going to beat the Colts? Anytime Indy is getting points, I’m picking them.
Graham: Listen- if Miami can completely dominate Indy, why can’t Arizona? I see a big game for the Cards. Arizona gets the nod.