I can't quit you, Survivor

As I mentioned last week, I’ve seen a lot of movies. I continue to watch my fair share (thanks to Netflix). I watch a decent amount of bad movies to, just to pass the time I suppose.

Last weekend was no different. With nothing better to do, I watched Paul Blart. I’m not proud of this, but watching the movie did one thing for me. It made me aware of another awesome Survivor song, “I Can’t Hold Back.”

Since I liked the song so much in the movie, I had to watch the video on YouTube.



Here’s my running diary of the video.

First off, we got some guys checking of some magazines. One of the guys is wearing serial killer style glasses and tops off the look with a nice mullet. The video can only go down from here.

But one loner is off by himself, pretending to look at a book although he’s really scooping out a chick at the store. I wonder if they’ll hit it off in the next 4 minutes.

The dude creepily stares at the girl while she pretends to read an Elvis book. The dude continues to stare and she likes it. Has this ever worked in real life? Only if you are a member of Survivor.

The girl is magically transformed from the store to a Survivor concert. Dreams do come true!

Just so we’re clear, the lead singer of Survivor is wearing red leather pants, a tight red tank top and a black leather jacket. I can’t even comment on this. The awesomeness overtook me.

The girl randomly dances in the front row of the concert while Survivor continues to lay down one of the best tracks of all time. I guess Survivor fans are okay with this girl taking up half of the first three rows to dance by herself. Personally, I would’ve tackled the girl for getting in between me and Survivor, but I’m not that classy.

After the rockin’ guitar solo, Survivor heads to the mellow part of the song, and, what’s this, we’re back at the store! This lasts for all of 8 seconds, because Suvivor isn’t mellow, they’re red-blooded American rockers.

The lead signer and the dancing girl are now on a subway. Make any sense? Of course not! Does anyone care? Of course not!

Mullet serial killer guy is getting hit on by 2 girls on the subway while a male nun watches on. Is this entire video just an LSD flashback or something? Is an elephant about to crush the subway car and poop out milkshakes?

The lead singer and the girl kiss, although I’m pretty sure they haven’t even talked to each other yet.

The 2:49 mark is the moment that sends it over the top. Whenever you got a sunglasses wearing male giving you the thumbs up on the subway, your life is complete.

Awesome concert scene. Making out on subway. Awesome concert scene. Making out on subway. Repeat another 3 times.

And we’re back in the store from the opening scene. The other members of Survivor drag the lead singer away from the store…and the girl, and then she ends up getting away. The lead singer just shrugs it off like the ending of a Mentos commercial.

I love the ‘80s.

By the way, how in the hell does this video have over 359,000 views?



Chris